Bad puns

[Cryptobiose]

Biology jokes !


How much room is needed for fungi to grow? As mushroom as possible.

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Guy: hey girl what's your cell?
Girl : eukaryotic

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Two blood cells met and fell in love, but alas it was all in vein.

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What did one cell say to its sister cell that stepped on its toe?
Mitosis !

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How many Biologists does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?
Four- 1 to screw it in and 3 to catalogue the environmental impact.

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How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature?
Romeostasis.

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I have to stop talking to my friends about mitosis. It’s such a divisive topic.

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The organ I hate the most is the kidney because it takes the piss out of me all day.

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It may look like i am doing nothing, but at a cellular level, i am quite busy.

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Deuterostomes are merely nothing but assholes, at one point of their life.

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Do you have a blood pH of over 7.8 ?
Cause you're a basic bitch.

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[Lilette]

[freeshost]

- I want to order, I am more than thirsty, but this guy doesn't come here.
- So what ? He is a waiter.

- Why is Leonardo DiCaprio called a star ?
- Everyone is turning around him. And he is hot.
- I don't want to see him !
- Who wants to become blind ?

- I can't see through my glasses.
- Naturally... you're so drunk that you see two instead of one glass of wine !

- What's your fun number ?
- Two heights for one tree.

- What is the worst enemy of freedom ?
- The monster of lockness.

- Have you ever fallen in love ?
- Yes, in Niagara Falls.

- Do we turn left ?
- Right !

A teacher is asking two boys : - How loud is silence ?
- the hearing boy : - I've never heard it.
- the deaf boy : - What ?

- What's the opposite of without ?
- Within !

- Have you got a light ?
- Just there ! (showing the sun)

- My life is just one among many others. Copy and paste it !
- I can upload and share you, my tender file !

- I am fed up with breaking stones, Joe.
- Let's take a break, fast !

[Cryptobiose]

Thanks elevators for bringing me up when i was down.

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So a guy gave his friend 10 puns hoping that one of them would make him laugh. sadly, no pun in ten did.

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What do you mean a thesaurus isnt a dinosaur ?

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Any salad can be a Caesar salad if you stab it enough.

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What are the strongest days of the week?
Saturday and sunday. the rest are weekdays.

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A C, an Eb and a G walk into a bar. 
“Sorry,” the barman says, “we don’t serve minors.”

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Every 5 seconds a woman gives birth to a baby. Stop this woman.

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Do you know why french people are so hardcore?
Because we eat bread
But they eat pain.

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Today in biology the teacher asked “why do chromosomes have to stick together?” And I whispered “because they’re bromosomes”

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[Loup]

j'espère que je ne suis pas HS

[Cryptobiose]

ahahaahah nope ^^

y a du jeu de mot, c'est en anglais, et c'est pourri \o/

i love it

[jutana]

... celle là j'ai compris ... et elle est excellente

[Loup]

Tant mieux!

[Loup]

[Cryptobiose]

Hihihihihihi

[Cryptobiose]

[Loup]

[Cryptobiose]

hinhinhin

the highlight of my day - l'est tordue celle là ^^

[Cryptobiose]

[Cryptobiose]